It is so hard to believe that it is 4 long years since my daughter died. There have been some strange coincidences recently. A special friend was admitted to the Hospice and the nurse came out to help get him from the car to the wheelchair and it was the same nurse that Kae had met before anyone else when when she was transferred from the Hospital. Which room was he put in? Yes the same one that Kae had died in. However when I sat with him and he slept a robin came to the window twice, looked in and flew away. Her blessing that it was right is how we saw this.
Kae will always be my inspiration for continuing to help those affected by eating disorders and for the talks I give to help people have some superficial understanding of the extent of the power of these illnesses, in particular Anorexia. Of the totally misconceived perception so many hold around it. Of the depth of the mental health illness and addictive personality of this illness. There is no choice and yet many people continue to have that perception about it. A lifestyle ‘choice’, a ‘vanity’, so many other ideas which are so far from the truth.
So as the 4 year anniversary of Kae’s death approaches I hope that she is proud of my continuing to fight this in her name and for her. To give some comfort to those who struggle to find help and support for their loved ones in an ever decreasing NHS service, especially CAMHS which I never had access to. Please let anyone who you know may need to chat about the ‘hell’ of living with a loved one who has an eating disorder about me, my help that is given freely and to anyone who needs it.
Sending love and light to all of those who are in the grip of this vile illness. x