Terrible Sadness

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How incredibly sad it was to read that Nikki Graham had lost her battle with anorexia. Even when the NHS could not help her and she was admitted to a private facility the ravages of the illness had destroyed her from the inside out.

In all honesty back in her Big Brother days I found her incredibly annoying and attention seeking. However, at that time I didnt have the insight into AN that I do now. I have to question her being allowed to be a contestant with her mental heal background but hindsight is always amazing. Her relationship with Pete was loved by everyone and his charisma along with his Tourette’s made him a loveable character and unique. It was, therefore, not surprising that they formed a relationship each having their own mental health issues and feeling ‘safe’ with each other perhaps.

I cried so much, for all of those who are lost and left to battle alone. I recommend people watch the Louis Theroux documentary on AN to see the utter disbelief and confusion when faced with this illness at its strongest. I applaud those who were on with him for their bravery and honesty which was again followed by a torrent of tears as I recognised one of the Units Kae had been in and her Consultant. This Consultant had written an honest second opinion after speaking with us both that there was virtually no chance of Kae reaching recovery and that to NG feed her again would never have a positive outcome.

So Nikki, I just wanted to say rest well. Whatever lies beyond your AN is no longer with you as it ravaged your physical body and your soul is free. Fly free beautiful lady and enjoy a life without pain and free from controls. You have learnt your lesson and now can rest. Biggest, gentlest hugs xxx

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